


keep your demons on a leash

by WelcomeToTheBadlands



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ghosts, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Awkward Conversations, Awkwardness, Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Ben Solo is a Mess, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, F/M, Inspired a Podcast, Investigations, Morning Cuddles, Mystery, Paranormal Investigators, Protective Rey (Star Wars), Rey Needs A Hug, Sharing a Bed, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-13
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:35:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22701064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WelcomeToTheBadlands/pseuds/WelcomeToTheBadlands
Summary: "You don't believe in the paranormal?" Rey said."No," Ben didn't even hesitate when he told her this. He had this tired look on his face, like he heard this question over and over again and he hated it. "Do you, Miss Johnson?""I'm trying to keep an open mind,"
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 12
Kudos: 23





	1. Chapter 1

**February 5 th, 2020**

[Start Recording]

“This show started out as a way to bring light to the more—odd jobs in America and turned into something else.” Poe Dameron said. “I’m sure, by this point, you’ve all heard of Rey Johnson, our former host and investigative journalist slash producer.” He sounded tired, and he was sure that the listeners would be able to tell that he was tired. He didn’t want to do this, didn’t want to release recordings of someone who was probably dead, but he knew that people needed to hear this. “This show, as you may know, spiraled into something different, and the episodes were pulled from the air by Resistance radio. But per Ben Solo’s and audience request, we’re airing them again so that you can get the full picture of everything that happened from 2015 to now. Hopefully, this will give you some clarity, and perhaps it will help someone find Rey, and bring her home.”

[Stop Recording]

__

**January 4 th, 2015 **

“You want me to go investigate a paranormal investigator,” Rey asked tiredly as Amilyn put ideas for this newest piece on her desk. “Me? Really?”

“I know that you don’t believe in ghosts, Miss Johnson.” Amilyn sighed. “But you don’t exactly have the same skepticism as Poe or Finn and you’ve certainly got more nuance and charm than Kaydel has about ghosts, I think you’re the best one to do this. Approach it from a different angle, make it interesting, make it you. I know that you can do it, Miss Johnson.”

Amilyn left before Rey could protest much more. As if on cue, Rose swooped in with a Styrofoam cup of coffee, waiting for Rey. “You’re a lifesaver, Rose.” She grinned. Rose winked at her and told her that she had to get back to work, and that she’d be over later for some wine. “You’re on.” Rey said. She returned back to work.

Rey prided herself on her research skills. She basically could eat, sleep, and breathe research and search results. Filtering out sources that were less than reputable and finding out how she was going to approach this first episode. It took her a little bit to figure out what she wanted to do with this episode, but she eventually came up with the idea that she would talk to a paranormal investigator that claimed to believe in the supernatural, and one that did not believe in the supernatural. There was one problem. What kind of paranormal investigator openly stated they didn’t believe in the supernatural?

Rey thought she was going to have more difficulty finding the person that she would interview for that, but as it turned out, it only took Rey twenty-three minutes to zero in on it.

Him.

Doctor Ben Solo was a famous paranormal investigator who’s whole schtick was he didn’t believe in the supernatural at all. He had several books published, some that Rey had even heard of but she hadn’t put a face to a name before. Some women on Twitter called him the hot skeptic, but most of the paranormal investigator world seemed to agree on one thing. Ben Solo was an asshole and they did not want to be associated to anything that involved his name.

This just made her more curious about him. It led her to interviews. Ones where people talked of his ability to eloquently take people down and make them look like an ass of themselves. It made Rey want to talk to him more while also seeing why he made an enemy of so many people that he talked to, so Rey reached out to him directly, his secretary and his publisher, trying to get in touch with him.

And then she moved on. She found the other person that she wanted to talk to. A paranormal investigator and her team of people that worked with her. Her name was Shira Brie, and she was open to an interview. In fact, she responded an hour after Rey had originally reached out to her about.

Rey got no response from Doctor Ben Solo or his team on the first day of formatting this story, but as Rey worked, she knew that she would get what she wanted out of him. After all, she was good at her job, resourceful.

__

**January 10 th, 2015 **

The one thing that Rey had always hated about her job was the flying. It was the worst way of traveling in her opinion, and if she had the time and the money, she would just drive everywhere in her car. But that wasn’t going to happen. She had to fly out from Seattle to Portland, Oregon to begin her interviewing for the episode. It was cold and rainy when she first came to Portland, and she couldn’t get the smell of cigarette smoke out of her lungs when she was waiting for her Uber to come and get her to take her to her hotel.

**Rose: _I already miss you, bitch_**

****

**Rey: _I’ve been gone for four hours_**

****

**Rose: _and I have to cover an episode of Wedge’s sports podcast,,, I’m dying_**

****

**Rey: _ew gross_**

****

**_Sorry b_ **

****

**_Gotta get checked in, will text back later_ **

****

**Rose: _ok bye, you suck_**

****

Arti, the travel coordinator for Resistance Productions, always had a knack for finding the best hotels for the lowest prices. It was his job, after all. Rey checked into the Hotel Delux at two fifteen, and she was bone dead tired, but she got on her bed and brought out her laptop, opening it up and immediately getting connected to the Wi-Fi. This is where she found the first email from Ben Solo’s secretary waiting for her.

**From:[bazine.netal@foglobal.net](mailto:bazine.netal@foglobal.net)**

**To:[official.reyjohnson@resistance.net](mailto:official.reyjohnson@resistance.net)**

**Subject: Request for a meeting with Ben Solo**

_Hello Miss Johnson,_

_It’s with regret that I have to inform you that Doctor Solo is not going to be able to meet with you this week._

_My apologies,_

_Bazine Netal_

It was straight and to the point, and Rey didn’t take it personally. She had someone else to interview, so she had something else to do right now, but she would get what she wanted, so she started to fire up her response.

**From:[official.reyjohnson@resistance.net](mailto:official.reyjohnson@resistance.net)**

**To:[bazine.netal@foglobal.net](mailto:bazine.netal@foglobal.net)**

**CC:[ben.solo@foglobal.net](mailto:ben.solo@foglobal.net)**

**Subject: Re: Request for a meeting with Ben Solo**

_Ms. Netal,_

_Thank you for telling me this! I would just like to say that I’ll be in Portland for three weeks, not one. So, if you have something coming up then, I would like to talk to him. I think he would provide a very fascinating angle on the show that I’m producing and seeing as he has a new book that’s about to come up, it could be an excellent way for him to get PR for it. Either way, thank you for your time._

_Sincerely,_

_Rey Johnson_


	2. Chapter 2

**February 8 th, 2020**

[Start Recording]

“It’s February 8th, and we have some updates as to this podcast, and Rey. Along with the re-release of this podcast, Resistance Productions will be releasing a segment investigating Rey Johnson’s disappearance.” There were so many other things that Poe Dameron would rather be doing, rather than talking about his friend, who was probably dead. “Before we start this segment, I want to plead with y’all to stop harassing Doctor Solo in this. Police has discounted him as a suspect immediately, as there is video evidence of Doctor Solo five states away from the site of Rey’s disappearance. Stop harassing Doctor Solo, he’s been through enough.”

[Stop Recording]

__

[ _Episode 1—Pilot_

_Inscription of the episode; This episode introduces the original intent of the show, to investigate people with odd jobs, and to interview two different paranormal investigators. Investigative Journalist Rey Johnson hosts this episode, and interviews Doctor Shira Brie and Doctor Ben Solo. Discovering the black tapes_.]

**January 20 th, 2015 **

_‘Shira Brie can only be described as a woman of mystery, her choppy red hair and pleasant face make her welcoming, but not the kind of person you would imagine being a paranormal investigator.’_ Rey was a little too hyper from the coffee she had just chugged when she met Shira Brie, an equally cheery woman who seemed to be eager to talk about her work. Which was good, someone who was inviting to show her what she did and what she believed in made for good content for the show. _‘She seemed to be happy to talk until that was, I asked Shira about Doctor Solo.’_

“So, would you say that the paranormal investigator community is close knit?”

“Yes, most of us know each other personally and are colleagues. But we’re starting to expand, the industry makes a lot of money as you know.”

“Really?”

“Yes,” Shira told her, “most colleges have paranormal units that have been around since the seventies, you know that right?”

“Interesting,”

“Yes, I myself have four doctorates.” Rey mentally jotted that down, wondering why she said that as if she had to prove something to her. Like Rey was going to say that she was insane or something when she studied this sort of thing.

“Wow, I don’t think I’d have the patience to go through that much school.” She laughed airily and kept talking. “So, if most of you know each other, can I ask if you know of a Doctor Ben Solo? He’s a paranormal investigator that claims not believe in the supernatural.” Shira rolled her eyes. ‘ _Shira Brie was the type of person who wore her feelings on her face. So, it was easy to judge just what she thought of Doctor Solo before she even said anything about him.’_

“Oh, yes. I’ve heard of Doctor Solo.” She said. “He’s a pretentious douchebag that no self-respecting paranormal investigator wants to be associated with.” Wow, she wasn’t sure that she expected such a loaded statement from someone. “I mean, he doesn’t even believe in what he’s devoted his life’s work to, won’t even give it the time of day. Who does that?”

“I don’t know,” Rey said, “it sounds like you don’t like Doctor Solo?”

“You can say that again.” She said. ‘ _After that, I decided to veer away from the topic of Doctor Solo and started to ask her about what Doctor Brie would do when investigating the paranormal. She seemed eager for the change of subject, and even offered to take me on a ghost hunt at an allegedly haunted credit union.’_

Rey was not someone who normally got scared by the paranormal, especially because she didn’t really think the paranormal was real or not real. But she went through the motions anyway. She was sure that Doctor Brie and her team certainly believed in the fact that paranormal entities existed—like most paranormal investigators did—the way that she and her team worked together was admirable, and as they walked her through EMF readings and talked to her about electro-magnetic waves.

This was the problem that she had always had with paranormal investigators, they always seemed to be so fixated on them being right that they never considered the fact that they weren’t right. Rey admired the fact that they were so passionate about their job, but she was more likely to be able to believe them if sometimes they admitted that things that people claimed were hauntings, weren’t actually hauntings. They could be explained away by a draft closing a door or pipes leaking.

More often it was that—than something else happening. This also didn’t mean that Rey didn’t think that there was a possibility of the paranormal happening, she kept her mind open towards it, thought that ghosts could be real, but like aliens, we haven’t found any solid evidence to say that aliens are in fact, one hundred percent real.

__

**February 10 th, 2020**

“We’re starting our investigation into the disappearance of Rey Johnson by interviewing someone that came to know her better than any of us—even her childhood friend Rose Tico—came to know her. Doctor Ben Solo is someone that many of you who listened to Johnson’s podcast before her untimely disappearance know. A year has passed since he’s done any interviews, but he agreed eagerly when I asked him to help with this segment.” Poe remembered watching Ben fiddle nervously as he waited for Poe to set his stuff up for the interview. He wondered how he felt, seeing all the equipment that Rey used again.

“I’m sure you have all heard Rey lovingly describe Doctor Ben Solo before, so I’m going to focus on getting straight to the interview. And starting our investigation into Rey Johnson’s disappearance, so here it is. The interview between me and Doctor Ben Solo.”

Poe put down the recorder and sighed. “Are you sure that you’re ready for this? I know that you’ve been getting a lot of hate and I really don’t want you to get any more from this.”

“I just want to do what I can to find her,” Ben said tiredly, “I know that she’d do the same for me.” Poe nodded, and told him that he was going to start the recorder again. Ben nodded, and the interview started. He could tell that Doctor Solo hadn’t slept in a while, and he couldn’t help but feel bad about it.

“Okay,” Poe said, “This is the interview with Ben Solo, it is three fifteen, February 10th, 2020. So—we’re going to start with the light stuff. Can you tell us what Rey was like to you?” Ben sighed, and Poe could tell that he was gathering his words.

“Rey was the nicest person I’ve ever met,” Ben said, “she was very complicated though, and frustrating, she was so stubborn and too nosy for her own good. She pushed, and pushed, and pushed. All the time. But she was also probably the reason that I got through these past years as well as I did.”

__

**January 28 th , 2015**

Rey was back in the studio editing the pilot episode of her podcast sooner than she thought that she would be. “Why aren’t you showing me what you got so far?” Rose whined as she watched Rey work with one headphone in and a styrofoam cup of coffee sitting right next to her. There were notes everywhere, things that she knew that she was going to have to record to make the episode have a longer run time. She wasn’t sure she had the motivation for that right now.

“Do you have any redbull left?” She asked Rose.

“Are you sure you want a redbull when you already have coffee?”

“Trust me, I’m going to need this by the time I get done by my coffee. Now, do you have a redbull or should I go ask Poe?”

“You’re going to die of a heart attack,” Rose sighed, “but I’ll go get it. Blueberry or regular?”

“Regular, thanks Rose.” She said, “I’m going to be here for a while,”

“Well don’t stay here for too long,” Rose said, “because you know how Resistance Productions is about overtime.”

“Yeah, yeah. I know.” Whenever Rey got in trouble, it was always for staying at work too long. What could she say? She liked her job. Plus, it helped that she didn’t have any kind of a social life outside of Resistance Productions either. Rose put the Redbull down on her desk.

“Don’t stay up too long, yeah?”

“Yeah, I won’t.”

__

**January 21 st , 2015**

**From:** [ **official.reyjohnson@resistance.net** ](mailto:official.reyjohnson@resistance.net)

**To:** [ **ben.solo@foglobal.net** ](mailto:ben.solo@foglobal.net)

**Subject: Request For Interview**

****

_Hello Doctor Solo,_

_Sorry to bother you, but this is Rey Johnson. I’m sure you are very busy with your newest book coming out but I wanted to reach out and ask if you could spare time for an interview. I checked with your assistant’s intern and it turns out that you’re not as busy as Miss Netal led me to believe. If you have any questions, you have my phone number by now._

_If you’re worried about this interview being with someone who believes in the supernatural, don’t. While I do like to keep an open mind, as per my job as a journalist, I also do like to believe that my approach to this sort of thing is very 50/50. I would love to talk to you if you can spare about thirty minutes. I’ll be in and out, you don’t have to worry._

_Sincerely,_

_Rey Johnson_

**From:** [ **ben.solo@foglobal.net** ](mailto:ben.solo@foglobal.net)

**To:** [ **official.reyjohnson@resistance.net** ](mailto:official.reyjohnson@resistance.net)

**Subject: Re: Request for Interview**

_No._

Wow. Rey knew that this guy had a reputation for being an asshole, but she didn’t think that it was going to be like this. Rey wasn’t done pushing yet. Amilyn had asked her to do a job, and Rey was curious, so she was going to get her interview with Doctor Solo, even if it killed her.

So, she didn’t email him again. She got crafty. First, she created another email address and then went right to Bazine Netal again, telling her that she was the photographer that Doctor Solo’s publicist hired, and they needed a few extra candids for his website.

That was what got her the time that she needed, for two o’clock on Thursday. Bazine warned her not to be late, because he was perpetually in a bad mood. So she wasn’t. She took the camera equipment that she did have, and prepared for a new day.

**Rose: _so what are you going to do if you get caught????_**

****

**Rey: _I’ll be fine_**

****

**Rose: _sure u will but be careful, pls_**

****

**Rose: _he strikes me as the sue happy type and u don’t got the money sis_**

****

**Rey: _haha_**

****

**Rey: _don’t worry about it, I’ll be fine._**

****

__

“Why are you avoiding interviews?” Bazine asked Ben. Ben was tired, and no amount of black coffee and bagels were going to cure that. He had so much that he had to do during the week, running an institute and hearing from students and all of that. “You’re driving your publicist crazy,”

“Miss Netal,” Ben sighed, “can we do this later?”

“Rey Johnson is a very good reporter,” His assistant said, “she’s won multitudes of awards for journalism and producing. She’s not some nutjob who won’t give you an intellectual conversation. You should talk to her.”

“I’m always painted negatively in interviews, frankly I’m tired of it.”

“Then maybe, you shouldn’t act like such a condescending ass during your interviews.” The blonde was right. But it wasn’t really something that he could help, it was just the way that Ben was. So, Ben changed the subject and asked him about his schedule.

“You have a photographer coming in at two,” She said. “Please don’t make this one cry,”

“Get me another cup of coffee and I won’t.”

“What’s the magic word?” Miss Netal put her hands on her hips.

  
“Please, can you please get me another cup of coffee, Miss Netal?”

“Yes, sir.”

__

Rey wasn’t nervous as she walked into the main building of the Skywalker Institute, she was mentally mapping the place out, so if she had to leave, she would find a way. She got to the main office before she had a problem, she was almost certain that Bazine Netal knew who she was. She didn’t say anything to indicate this in particular, but she did give her a wink and smiled at her in a way that let her know that she knew something that she wasn’t talking about. “Doctor Solo will be in with you in just a minute,” Miss Netal said.

“Okay, thank you.” Rey waited there for a minute and took note of his office. She could tell that he was a fan of coffee, but that was about it. He didn’t have any pictures of family and everything was a little too neat. The only sign of mess or personality was the number of coffee cups on his desk. She wasn’t sure what she was expecting when she met Doctor Solo. She had done her research, yes. Seen Ted Talks of him and seen the way that he discounted the paranormal in everything. She even know about the one million dollar prize for anyone that had solid proof of the paranormal.

But there was no one that had delivered proof of the paranormal in a way that Doctor Solo would call concrete. She wanted to ask him so many questions, what he considered concrete evidence, if anyone had ever come anywhere close to it. There were so many things about this man that intrigued her.

She didn’t expect to be momentarily speechless when she first laid eyes on him. Doctor Solo was tall. Rey had seen that from pictures of him and striking as well. Everything from his face to his dark black hair reminded her of a Rembrandt painting. That was just the first thing that came to mind. “Ah hello, Miss—”

“I feel like I have to tell you right here that I’m not here to take photos, I’m Miss Johnson. I called and left some emails and I thought that it would just be easier if I came in and talked to you, of course if you want me to leave that’s understandable.” She wondered what Ben was going to do, what his reaction was going to be. It definitely wasn’t what she expected, especially coming from a man who was notorious for being an awful person.

But what she saw instead was a tired man bite his lip, and then chuckle a little bit. His laugh was low, and a nice sound. She felt like she just witnessed something that didn’t happen often. “Well, usually I’m not so easy to manipulate, but since you got in here I don’t see why I can’t give you an interview.”

“Great,” She said, “so let’s get to it.”

His face was fairly unreadable, but Rey felt like that was just the kind of face he gave off to everyone he first met. And all of the sudden, Rey wondered if he was just more of an introvert, who didn’t really care to be around people most of the time and not really an asshole like most people claimed he was. She definitely didn’t get that superiority complex that people were talking about online when they talked about him, and she found that she was very good at reading people’s characters. “Right, let’s get into it.” He moved behind his desk and sat down, Rey pulled up a seat and pulled out her phone.

“It’s alright that I record this, right?”

“Right,” He said.

__

**February 10 th, 2020**

“And why would you say that? What about her got you through these past few years?”

“She’s a very hopeful person,” Ben said without thinking. He didn’t have to think. There was a very long list of things that Ben Solo loved about Rey Johnson, and Poe Dameron had been there to see him declare most of the reasons that he loved her. He and Rey had been—more than close—and when she disappeared, Ben Solo had been utterly destroyed. Poe was ready to take breaks, seeing that Ben was already struggling through the interview. “And like I said, very stubborn, and caring. When she saw that I wasn’t doing well or I was stressed and wasn’t taking care of myself, she would insist that the two of us go out and talk about everything that didn’t involve our investigation. She even let me dogsit her dog when I was stressed out and needed a calming presence that wasn’t a human.”

“That sounds like Rey,” Poe said, “by the way, how is Bee?”

“Bee is good,” Ben said, “she’s been sad, because Rey isn’t back. But she’s been cheering up more lately and cheering me up more lately so—yeah.”

“That’s good. That’s good.” Poe didn’t want to press Ben for questions that would leave him uncomfortable, but this was his job. This was what he had to do.

__

**January 21 st, 2015**

“Good, so Doctor Solo, let’s start with the basics.”

“Just call me Ben,” He told her.

“Alright, Ben. I’m glad that you decided to talk with me today, instead of kicking me out.”

“Yeah, well what can I say, you got in here so I feel as though I should indulge you. At least, a little bit.” Rey really wasn’t sure what to make of this guy, but she supposed that was a reason to keep going on. So, she did.

That was her job. She was good at pressing. Figuring out people. “So, as you know I’m doing a show investigating people with jobs that society would consider odd and what they do for a daily basis, and I thought as my first episode is paranormal investigators, that I should get an interview from both sides of the spectrum. Someone who believes in the paranormal and someone who doesn’t. You don’t—believe in the paranormal, right?”

“Right,” Ben said.

“Do you, Miss Johnson?”

“Please, just call me Rey. And—I try to keep an open mind—as a journalist.”

“That didn’t sound very enthusiastic, so is that a yes or a no?”

“Does everything have to be so black and white, Doct—Ben? I think maybe in a more agnostic sense, I’m willing to say that it’s possible. I’m just not very enthusiastic about it. I’ve never personally had any ghost experiences and I don’t think I could see myself ever having one.” She’s ready for him to laugh at her, for still thinking that there is a chance that the paranormal is real at all, but he doesn’t. And Rey finds herself thinking that this man is an enigma, even though she rarely ever hands that word out to anyone that she meets.

“That’s a respectable way to look at it, I guess.”

“Well,” She said, “interesting.”

“Interesting?”

“Yeah,” She said, “I’ve seen some of your interviews. You seemed a lot less likely to listen to people who thought that there was a chance that the paranormal existed.”

“Well you see, Miss Johnson—”

“Rey,” Rey corrected.

“Rey,” Ben says, “people that I’ve talked to aren’t as level headed as you on this sort of thing. So, usually I’m in a lot worse of a mood when I talk to them. I don’t like irrationality.” That was interesting. Rey could see that the more she looked around his office and thought that maybe he was a bit OCD, maybe he liked order, seeing as he was so clean.

“Fan of the scientific method,”

“Definitely,”

She noted that he fidgeted a little bit as the two of them spoke, and Rey wasn’t sure if he was nervous to talk to her specifically, or if he was just that way around most people that he met. She tried to ease back a little to make the conversation more comfortable. She didn’t want him uncomfortable during the interview. “So, can you tell me why you chose this career path? Why you wanted to be a paranormal investigator?”

“Like I said, I don’t like irrationality. The majority of people in this field don’t open their mind to the fact that it could be nothing, that there’s a ration explanation to what they’re experiencing.”

“So you aim to be a voice of rationality?”

“Yes, in a field where there often is none.”

__

**February 10 th, 2020**

“So, what was she like—in 2019?”

“You mean what was she like the month she disappeared?”

“Yes, what was she like the month she disappeared?” Poe could see that Ben was struggling.

“Do you want to take a break?”

“Yeah,” He said. “I think that I need to.” Ben got up and left the room. “I need to get some water.”

__

**January 21 st, 2015**

“So, Ben.” Rey said. “Do you think the reason why you have such a reputation in the community is because of the stance you take?” She pressed pause on the recorder, because she could tell that he was about to get uncomfortable. “I want you to know that I don’t agree with people on that by the way, if you’re worried about how this interview is going to turn out, I won’t paint you in a light that I don’t see you in.”

“Thank you,”

“Let’s resume the interview,” She took her hand off the pause button.

“Yes,” Ben swallowed, “I think so. But I will admit that I’m not great at talking to people, so that didn’t help my case at all.”

“Well, I think you’re doing just fine right now.” She said. She bit the inside of her cheek, taking him in for a second, and taking in a breath before she asked her next question. “So, about the one million dollar prize. Has anyone tried to claim it?”

“Ah, yes.” Ben said. “A lot of people.”

“Has anyone ever come close?”

“No,” Ben said, “never.”

“Interesting,” She turned and looked around his room, and then towards a bookcase full of VHS tapes. “What are those?” She asked. She was just curious. It was then that the interview seemed to turn sour. Ben asked for her to leave and said that he was busy for the rest of the day. Rey was confused, but she obliged him and left.

__

**January 28 th, 2015**

Amilyn was interested to hear what Rey had to say when she said that she thought of a show more interesting than what they originally had planned. But, Rey told her that while she was working on something, she needed to go back to Portland, to talk to Ben Solo more. “Didn’t he kick you out?” Amilyn asked her. 

“I can get back in there,” She said, “I just need the funding. Trust me. Please?”

“Okay,” She said, “I’ll let you do this. Bur you need to be careful, Rey. I heard that Solo isn’t the type of person that you want to mess with.”

“I’ll be careful,” She promised.


	3. Chapter 3

**February 10 th, 2020**

[Start Recording]

“There has been a lot of calls in since the first part of our investigation,” Poe tried not to sound angry. He was too close to this investigation. He didn’t want to do this, but everyone was closer to this than him. “I know that you guys are enthusiastic about finding Rey, as are we, but there are messages coming in of people claiming to be a missing person and I have to tell you to stop. Unless you have actual tips on Rey Johnson, I need you to stop. You forget that the people investigating her disappearance are her friends and her family, so please, if you have any compassion stop trying to call in pretending to be her. It’ll detract from the investigation, now, back to the interview with Doctor Solo.”

[Stop Recording]

__

“Sorry about that,” Ben told him. He sat down as Poe started the recording again. “I just needed to take a breather.”

“It’s fine. Understandable, even. But we have to get back to the interview, can you tell me what Rey was like in 2019?”

Ben took a deep breath in before he started talking, “She wasn’t sleeping.” Ben said. “Less than she had ever slept before, and she would wake up and move around the apartment a lot. I think she felt bad that she would wake me up, because she went to a sleep doctor trying to figure out why she wasn’t sleeping.”

“Did you know why she wasn’t sleeping?” Poe asked her.

“Paranoia,” Ben said, “she thought that there was something after the both of us. After a while, we started to fight. Because she started making bad decisions, and she wasn’t feeling good. Some of it was my fault, I suppose. I was irritating and there were parts of the investigation that I wasn’t helpful with—I—I lied to her at one point. And at first I thought, when she disappeared she was just taking time away, but she came back for a day and we talked and then I went to the bathroom and when I came back, she wasn’t there. She wasn’t there and I was confused. Her phone was still there and so was her bag and her keys,”

__

**January 29 th, 2015**

Ben wondered if he had lost his mind, even giving Rey Johnson the time of day. She had made twelve calls to him and made another two emails, finally he called back. He didn’t get an answer from her cell, but he left a message. “Uh, hello. I’m returning the twelve calls made by Miss Johnson. Call me.” He hung up and wondered if he had done the right thing. If he shouldn’t be indulging this right now. He probably shouldn’t be. But he was. It had been a long time since Ben had done anything like this—but he felt like it was time that he do something—something stimulating. And his publicist thought it was a good idea too.

It only took an hour for Rey to call him back, “Hello, this is Doctor Solo. How may I help you?”

“Hey, this is Rey. You called me back.”

“I feel like our interview ended sort of badly last time,”

“Yes, I suppose it did.” Rey said. She didn’t sound angry like Ben thought that she might be. Which was good. He would’ve hated if she was. “If you’re scared that I’m going to paint you in a negative light, I can assure you that quite the opposite is being done.”

“Oh, that’s good.” Ben tried not to sound affected or nervous about this, but he was. “But that wasn’t the reason that I called you back,”

“Oh, then what was the reason that you wanted to call me back?”

“It was about that question you asked me. About the VHS tapes?”

__

Rey had been ready to find another way back into Ben Solo’s office when she got a call from him. She didn’t think she would get what she wanted so easily. “The VHS tapes,” Rey repeated as she pressed play on her recorder.

“Yes, I call them the ‘Black Tapes’—personally. And if you want to come back to finish our interview, I’ll show you one.”

“I’ll have to make a flight back out there. Does Thursday work?”

“Thursday at 2:30 looks good to me.”

“Good, see you then,” Rey got off the phone and saw Poe and Rose staring at her. “What?” They shared a knowing look with each other and then burst out laughing.

“What?”

“Babe, you two are going to fuck by the end of the year.”

“Oh my god, we are not.”

She turned off her recorder, “You so are.” Poe laughed. “You so are.”

__

**February 10 th, 2020**

“She was in your apartment when she disappeared.”

“Yes, and then she wasn’t. Obviously, that made people—think things. I don’t blame them because it looks bad.”

“I’d like to take the time to remind people that Ben has proof of innocence.” Poe interjected.

“Yes,” Ben said, “there’s security footage of her walking out into the hallway of my apartment complex, around the corner and into the elevator and then she was just gone. The footage places me in different places at those time. And my apartment complex has very, very good security.”

“That’s what got you discounted from the case,”

“Right,”

“And then what happened afterwards?”

“I tried to find her, so did the police, but they didn’t know her like I did.”

“So where did you start? Looking for her, I mean.”

“I just want to say right now that some of it I can’t disclose, but I went to her apartment because she had given me a key. I tried to figure out of if there would be something there that would tell me where she was. I really wanted to find her. I still want to find her—obviously.” Ben said.

__

**February 1 st, 2015**

The next time that Rey walked into Ben’s office, it was different. He wasn’t sure how, but he knew that there was something different about all of it. The way she walked in with her hair done up and lipgloss on and even though it wasn’t really sexy at all, she looked so pretty that Ben’s lungs started to hurt. Which was weird, because Ben had never really been attracted to women before—besides Rachel Weisz in ‘The Mummy’—but that was another story. Ben had never found actual women attractive before, but that was curse of being bi—“Hello, Doctor Solo.”

“Ben.” He corrected again. He would be lying if he didn’t say that he wanted to hear her say his name.

“Ben,” Rey said with a soft chuckle, her breath was light and airy and as she sat down across from him, she smiled and got out her recording stuff. He watched in silence for a minute, not sure what to do or what to say, just taking her in while she was there across from him. “So, I just want to make sure that you’re okay with all of this being recorded, right?”

“Yes,” He said, “I’m fine with it.”

“Good, then let’s begin—or resume. Whatever you want to call it.” She pressed record and they got back to it.

“So, we’re back at Doctor Ben Solo’s office because he wanted to resume the interview after it ended rather abruptly last time. He has offered to show us something that he referred to as ‘the Black Tapes’. Right?”

“Right,” He said.

“Can you tell me about the Black Tapes?”

“To be honest, the Black Tapes are a set of tapes of recorded events that I don’t have the technology to _completely_ debunk at the time, but could later. Or other researchers could if need be,”

“Interesting,” He wasn’t sure what she was thinking when she said that, but she was looking at the tapes like she wanted to look at all of them and pour over everything, and although Ben was never one for looking at these things he was eager to show them to her. Because he did want someone to talk with about this sort of stuff, and he wanted to talk to her. He wanted to get to know her more. “I can’t remember the last time I saw a VHS tape if I’m being perfectly honest,”

“Ugh, don’t make me feel older.”

“How old are you?”

“Thirty,”

“You’re not much older than me,” Rey rolled her eyes, “but—anyways. Can you show me one of the Black Tapes?” He does. Ben Solo is nothing if not extremely organized, he’s organized all of them in a specific way and he picks up the least freaky one that he was pretty sure that he could debunk for her of all people and puts it in.

He had no idea what he was going to get into.

__

**December 30 th, 2018 **

Rey had been silent for hours, there in the recording studio staring at her notes. She hadn’t started recording and Poe told Ben that there was something wrong with Rey. Ben had come over almost immediately. He wasn’t sure exactly what was wrong until he talked to Poe. “She hasn’t been sleeping,” He told her, “she’s been watching the video of the tapes, over and over again. I think she’s getting herself freaked out. Maybe you can talk her out of it?”

“How long has she been here?”

“Since yesterday,”

“And you didn’t call me?”

“I mean—you two have been kind of rocky lately so I wasn’t sure if it was okay.” Ben understood why he would be apprehensive of that.

“She aired something that she promised me that she wouldn’t,” Ben told him, “I was mad.” Poe nodded and they talked about if for a minute before Ben turned to the recording studio and knocked on the door. Rey looked up at the door, not knowing he was there.

“Come in?” He heard, and he came in. Rey took in a deep breath when she saw him. “Hey,”

“Hey,” Rey said, “didn’t expect to see you here.”

“I wasn’t—I was going to give you some space and I can go if you want but I wanted to see you again.” Rey nodded, but she didn’t get up. He could tell that she hadn’t been sleeping at all since their last fight. “I wanted to tell you that I’m not mad at you anymore, for what you aired. I understand why you did it.”

“Still, I shouldn’t have put it on the air without your consent. That was unethical of me, and a bad move, as your girlfriend. I’m sorry.” He wasn’t sure he would have gotten that from her, but he was relieved that he heard that. “I won’t do that again, I promise.”

“Good,” He said. Ben stuffed his hands in his pockets and looked her up and down for a second. “You look like you can use a break, can I take you out to lunch?”

“Yeah,” She nodded and got up. That was a lot easier than Ben expected it to be.

__

**February 1 st, 2020**

Rey isn’t sure what she’s expecting when she watched the first Black Tape, but it’s definitely something. Rey was never really a believer of the paranormal—or a disbeliever for that matter—but there’s something about seeing actual tapes of things that look like they would be out of a horror movie but are actual real life that gives her a vague sense of unease. She was watching the tape of a boy’s birthday party. At first, there was nothing about the tape that seemed remarkable. She was watching a family, they seemed happy. Was it bad that she felt a little bit jealous?

Maybe.

She didn’t say anything about it as she watched the party, combing for whatever she was looking for, and then she saw it. Something in the background of the frame that was a shadow, but not the regular shadow of a human man. The shadow of someone long, and tall. It was a figure of pure black and there were no distinguishable features about it’s face. It’s fingers were long, unsettling long. Rey felt like she was going to vomit when she looked at it. There, Ben paused it. “There. Do you see it?”

“Yep.” She said. “What the fuck was that?”


	4. a development

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is a short update, hope u like

**February 1 st, 2015**

“That’s what a lot people say when they first see it,” Ben says. And Rey hates how he seems so sure of everything. She could tell how it would be infuriating to a lot of people, but she supposed that was human nature. Being upset when people were confident over something they disagreed with you on, “That’s what I saw when I first saw it. You see, that’s what the brain always does when you want to see something there that isn’t actually there.” Except, Rey was sure that there was something there in the picture. It was a long shadow looking figure. A man. But he didn’t have a face. He didn’t have any sort of features at all, he was just long, tall and standing behind this little boy in the video.

No one else acknowledged the fact that he was still in the room, and Rey wondered if the kid could see the thing, because he didn’t acknowledge it either but there was a second where he paused and looked off into the distance and it was just disturbing to see. “I can see how people would think that this is convincing,” Rey told him. “Why don’t you tell the viewers why this—thing in the video isn’t real. How it can be faked.”

“It’s pretty easy,” He said, “a trick of the light. A doctored photo, have you seen what Photoshop has been able to do recently?” He asked her. “Things get a little bit harder when you consider what these things are filmed on. This was filmed on actual film, not digitally, which is easier to alter.”

“Interesting,”

“But there are still explanations for why these could be faked, it could be staged in the room itself, which believe me, is something that I’ve run across many times. Could be light, could be something obscured. Look at it longer, can you tell me that that’s really the shape of a man?” Rey did, blinking a few times as she looked at it.

“I guess you could say no,”

“Exactly.” Ben told her. “The mind sees what it wants you to see, it’s kind of like that blue and black or white and gold dress that went around. The dress was blue and black but there was enough light to make it look slightly discolored, and people that wanted to see it differently would see it as white and gold.”

“Right, that makes sense.” Rey said. The two of them talked more about the Black Tapes and everything that went into investigating them, and when Rey was done recording, she put up her recorder in her bag and smiled shyly at Ben. There were a lot of things that she noticed about him. The way he didn’t like meeting people’s eyes. The way he always looked tired but put together, like he wanted to take a nap but he was afraid that laying down would mess up the suit that he permanently wore.

“So, I guess that’s that.” Rey said.

“Right,” Ben said, “and I think that I should give you my direct cell, so you don’t have to go through my secretary.”

“Really?”

“Right, just in case you have any more questions about your story—thing.”

“Thank you, that would actually be really helpful.” Rey gave him a smile and he regarded her carefully.

“Right, so the number.”

“The number.”

__

**February 12 th, 2020 **

Sometimes Ben had dreams about Rey. He supposed that it was normal to have dreams like this. Nightmares. Each one plaguing his memory as he wondered what could have happened to her. Wondering if this was because of the investigation, because of her delving into him and his past, or because she was starting to make herself go crazy. The only thing that he could hope was that Rey was alive and she was safe, and that she could come back home so that she was with people that loved her dearly.

It was three thirty in the morning and Ben was thinking about Rey again. That’s when Poe called him. “Poe? What are you still doing up at this hour?” He asked him as if he hadn’t also been awake at this hour.

“Sorry if I woke you up,” Poe said, he was breathing kind of heavily and sounded kind of dazed, but he continued to talk. “I think that I might have a lead on something and I’m going to send it to you now, but I need you to delete it off your phone when you see it.”

A text arrived on Ben’s phone and he didn’t look at it yet. “What’s this?”

“Just—look at it. I don’t know if I’m going insane because of sleep deprivation or what.”

Ben opened the text with Poe still on the line and stared at the blurry photo for a long time, blowing it up as much as possible. It was blurry, but there was something that wasn’t. In the corner of the photo, being led away from the view of whatever security camera had captured this was Rey, looking over her shoulder. It took Ben a second to really see it, and part of him told him that he was hallucinating it, but she was wearing the same clothes that she had been wearing when she disappeared from Ben’s apartment a year ago.

“That’s—that’s—did you notify the police?” Ben’s voice was shaking.

“Yes, and they think that it’s her.”

“Where was this taken?”

“Just two blocks away from your apartment.”

__

**February 6 th, 2015**

“I think that we need to keep digging,” Rey told Amilyn, “this sounds better than the project that we’re currently on and you know that nothing will be this interesting. So will you let me continue to work with Doctor Solo?” Amilyn had just finished listening to a mock pilot of the podcast episode that was going to be done on the Paranormal.

“Are you sure that you want to do this? You weren’t too keen on it when we first started.”

“Something’s changed.” Rey told her. “I have a feeling that this will be a great boost for us and the station in general. So please, greenlight this Miss Holdo.”

Amilyn looked down at her and then glanced to the computer.

“I need written consent from Doctor Solo that he wants to participate as well, after that, you’re free to do as you please.”

Rey handed her a contract, “I had him fax it in yesterday,” Amilyn raised an eyebrow at her, clearly amused.

“Well then,” Amilyn told her, “I think that you have a lot of work to do.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi, sorry it took a while to update! So much has been going on. I hope that if you're in quarantine you are safe. There is some information about my life status on my twitter here and how I have been affected by COVID-19. Read here if you're interested. https://twitter.com/kirasbens/status/1240316155098812418

**February 14 th, 2020**

“Listeners, this one is going to be a little bit different from the rest of the episodes.” Ben was listening to Poe’s voice on the podcast. “Instead of airing the rest of the series, I’m going to tell you that came to acquire some things that would lead me to believe that Rey is still alive. I have been asked to turn it over to the police, and I did after I made a copy of it, but there are some things I cannot tell you about the handling of the thing that I gave to the police.” He didn’t know why he was listening to this with his coffee, it would only give him anxiety. He knew it would. “These things, that I have acquired, I have to be very careful in sharing their information so that Ben and I, as well as Rey if she’s still out there doesn’t get hurt.” He took another sip of his coffee. Why was he sitting here again? Why was he doing this?

Part of him wondered what would have happened if he had never indulged Rey with this thing in the first place. She would still be fine, working at the podcast station. Maybe she would be covering boring stories that she didn’t like but she would put that charm that Rey always did to every story and captivate her audience. That was something that Rey was really good at. Making every story too irresistible to stay away from, but there was a problem in that. “There is a chance that this information that I have might be a joke, a cruel prank that someone is playing on us to get attention. Which is why I have to be careful about what I do next.” Ben stopped listening to the podcast. He couldn’t even make it through the rest, even though there was information that Poe said was important on there, information that he hadn’t found out about yet.

Instead he went back to his room and took the college hoodie that Rey loved to wear so much out of his dresser. He took it in his arms, and he laid down in his bed and he just stayed there. He couldn’t cry, he couldn’t. He knew that Rey hated it when other people were worried about her. He was the exact same way. That didn’t stop him from worrying about her. From wanting her to come home.

__

**January 4 th, 2017 **

Ben had been in his bed for three days by the time Rey came knocking at his door. When he didn’t answer her, she broke in. Of course, she would know how to pick locks, Ben couldn’t even imagine all the things that Rey knew that she didn’t tell him about. When she got into his room, she stopped there and just stared at him. “You too?” He raised an eyebrow. “I was just feeling like shit and then I thought, gee I haven’t heard from Ben in a month. When’s the last time you’ve slept?” It was a weird question to ask since he was in bed, but they were at a point when weird questions need to be asked.

“Three days,”

“And when’s the last time you ate?”

“I don’t know,”

“Showered,”

“Three days,” He got to look at her, she looked about just as tired as he did.

“You know I see things when I don’t sleep,” Rey said, “you told me that it’s just my mind playing tricks on me. I don’t have a demon or a ghost terrorizing me and that my journalism is sensationalist. Do you see things when you don’t sleep, Ben?” He didn’t say anything, “what’s going on?”

“I’m sorry for saying your journalism is sensationalist,” He said.

“While I appreciate your apology, I have a feeling that isn’t what you were going to tell me. So, why don’t you just tell me what’s up, and I can help you, okay? Because believe it or not, even after you yelled at me, I do care about you.” She sat down at the side of his bed. “What’s up?”

“There’s a lot of things that you don’t know about me,” He told her, “a lot of things that would make you judge me a lot more than you already do.”

“I doubt that,” Rey said, “I don’t judge people that much. I think that’s just in your head.”

“You don’t even know—”

“Ben,” Rey said, “while you can be a know it all about ghosts, you don’t know anything about humans. You’re really shitty at figuring them out, I’m not. I don’t judge people. So what’s going on?”

“The cult that you mentioned in your podcast without talking to me first is directly tied to my family,”

__

**February 8 th, 2015 **

The first episode had come out and was doing a lot better than Rey thought it would. She was happy about it, but her work never stopped. She and Ben had been emailing nonstop, and at first he had been surly in his responses, but after a while there was something of some kind of friendliness there. Now, she was packing to talk to the person in the first ‘Black Tape’ that Ben and her had watched.

She wasn’t sure how to feel about that. “Good luck,” Poe had told her, “go catch a ghost.”

“Haha, very funny.” Rey remembered the way she grew up, how she had uber religious foster parents and she told herself that she was never going to be religious like them. How things like that scared her and she dove into science after she had left the house. But things like that still scared her, every time she thinks about the supernatural she thinks about the same people that used to lock her in a closet when she didn’t memorize a certain section of the Bible, and she’s scared, because they thought that it was so real and part of her mind still thinks that what if—no…

She isn’t going to go down that road.

She’s going to go on a trip with Ben and be a reporter because that’s what she is. A reporter.

And that’s what she does.


End file.
